Thursday, October 15, 2015

Water Girl: bowling team

WANTED: Water girl. Bring us water and food. Pay is little fun is huge. Catch: it's for a bowling team. Uncatch: We'll share our prize money. 

Call **********

This is the 15th add I've replied to. If it says money, I'll take it. I get the job. Requirements were: be sexy to throw the other teams off. I guess I'm sexy enough to distract a bowling team. I start on Wednesday. 

The 12 pound ball glides off my fingers whooshing through the air, only to drop the floor with a bang. 
"Jardin! Hit the pins down, not the floorboards!" Mark yells. He's my "boss," my very sexy boss. 
The team laughs. I pick up another ball and hurl it down the lane. Gutterball! 
Mark laughs. I start getting angry. 
"You know, the point of bowling is to actually hit the pins." 
"Well the point of being a water girl is not to bowl. So shut up." I say dejectly. Mark pulls me aside. 
"Hey these guys have been playing since they were kids. Except Brett. He started last month. He's weird though." True. "What I'm trying to say is that you shouldn't beat yourself up." His big brown eyes concentrate on mine. 
"It doesn't really matter since I'm just the water girl." I reply. 
"Well speaking of that, we've got a home game next..." He says but I don't hear. I'm too busy looking at his soft hair, and sharp jaw line. "...lemonade. Are you listening?"
"Yeah yeah game next Friday."
Mark laughs. He tells me that since I'm here I might as well learn to bowl. He gives me an 8 pound ball. It looks like paper in his strong arms. Focus. 
"Go ahead, and toss is like this." He makes a pose. I step up to the lane, swing my arm back, close my eyes. Swing my arm forward, let go. I turn around. ...
"You hit a pin!"
"I hit a pin!!?"
Mark runs up, and very awkwardly high fives me. 

Next Tuesday. Big day. Grizzly Bowls (me) take on The Fast Lane. There are other teams, but let's be honest. We're the best. If we win, our teams of five gets 10,000 dollars and a free trip to the bowling nationals. Mark is captain, Brett, Jim, and Antoine are star players. I'm the water girl. The prospect of 2,000 dollars brightens my day. I got off the bus at 10:40. The tournament starts at 11:00. Now I sit here waiting. I have already set up the water cooler, and put in some lemonade powder. Slowly people start arriving. None of the other teams have water girls. I feel prettyyyy dumb. Finally my team gets here. 
"Hey guys!" 
"Hi piper" is the monotonous reply. 
Considering that bowling isn't a very exerting sport, Mark comes over to me for breaks quite a bit. 
"We're on a roll!!" Mark will say. We've beat 3 teams now. The Fast Lane just needs to defeat the Pig Pins to advance and face us. Jim heads over. 
"Cup please." 
"Right away!"
I hand him a waiting cup of lemonade. The first cup to be given out. 
Jim takes a sip and his face turns bright red! He drops the cup screaming, "What kind of water is that?!!?" 
"It's not water, it's lemonade!" 
Jim falls to the ground, gasping for air. 
"Call.. An ambulance.." 
"I Don't have a phone !!" Mark and Antoine run over. Mark dials 9-11. 
"Piper! Don't tell me you brought lemonade!" Antoine yells "Jim is allergic to lemonade powder. ALLERGIC PIPER." 
I start crying. "I didn't know!" I wail. "Now Jim is going to die and its all my fault!"
The paramedics rush in and put Jim on a stretcher. A woman comes over to tell me that Jim will be fine. 
The Fast Lane just won their match. We're up against them, without Jim. Uh-oh. We need 4 bowlers. I'll save you the trouble of reading that embarrassment. We lose, horribly. Mark doesn't say a word. I very much dislike bowling. I call jim. He's fine, but the medical bill was pretty big. I offer to pay what I can... Which is basically nothing. At least no one pulled a gun on me today lol. 

Monday, October 12, 2015

Mad Money

Saturday. 4:00 P.M. Its been a while since I lost my job. I've been doing a few things here and there for a couple of bucks. I had put my name and number on telephone polls and now I sit here, waiting. And by here I mean my basically empty apartment. I should get a roommate.. It is now empty because I've sold basically everything to keep living here. Funny. Phone is ringing!! I scramble to pick it up.
"Hello?" I practically squeal. A deep voice replies. He wants me to meet someone. A man named Hemson Tenths. He says he will arrange the meeting. Little Tokyo. Monday, 3:00. I need to get information. He'll pay me afterwards. He hangs up. I'll admit, this is pretty sketchy, but I need the money. Only money to be made in this town is always doing something questionable. And considering the lack of police force in this town, it won't be close to an issue. For crying out loud, a man was set on fire last week. I'm not even doing anything illegal! 
Monday. 2:35 P.M. I head over because of nerves. And lack of a life. I walk into the restaurant and brush off the rain. I look for a dark seat. The restaurant has poor lighting, so this isn't hard. A man walks up, and introduces himself as Cho. He is short and has lines on his face from smiling too much. He offers me discounted bubble tea while I wait. 
Tenths walks in. I know because who wear a trench coat? 
"Hiya!" he chirps "What's your name? Since you already know mine!" I don't really know what to say, I don't know what I need to know. He goes on saying,  "So, you're blackmailing me yeah? I can't let info like that go unchecked, so here I am! But, what is it you want, huh? Your must want something, or else you wouldn't have called me out here. Is it information? You wanna know something? I'd love to tell you something! You do want to know something right? I bet it's about that dead girl! Oh! I've got a picture on my phone here let me-"
I can't do this. 
"No!" I practically shout. I want to get out of here-this guy is crazy. "I don't want to see a dead child." We sit in silence. "...Your girlfriend." I finally try. "I want to hear about your girlfriend." 
He starts rambling on and on, "Well, I had this one friend from a long time ago who worked at a Beauty Supply store and sold some of her husband's product on the side."
"You were with a married woman?!"
"Wait, so you actually were talking about romantic partners?"
I start getting frantic.
"What else would I be talking about?!"
"I'm sorry lady, but I don't really follow you. Why would you wanna know about that?" 

I'm not good at this. I get up and start collecting my things. I turn around to pick up my umbrella, then I go. 
"Wait a sec, lady." I turn around, annoyed. "You're not gonna tell anyone about what you found out, yeah?"
"Dunno, It's not like you gave me any inclination not to."
"Aw, sweetheart that wasn't a question!" he laughs as he pulls out a small revolver. My heart skips a beat.

 "You wouldn't kill me he-"
"Of course not," the cylinder tumbled open, revealing the empty chambers. "this isn't even loaded. I'm just saying if word gets out about me, I might have to, y'know. Pew pew!"
I nod my head and back out of the store. I thought he was crazy, but not this crazy. I go home, and try not to cry.